Health: Today, we had guests coming over. My dad wanted me to make some...

By Joy - 16/06/2010 14:42 - Denmark

Today, we had guests coming over. My dad wanted me to make some bacon, but I refused because I'm a vegetarian, and don't like to touch meat. His response? 'Good joke honey, now make the bacon.' FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 063

You deserved it 19 237

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 21/06/2012 14:52 - United States - Medway

Today, when I told my family I was a vegetarian, I expected them to make fun of me because that's just my family. But what I wasn't expecting was my dad to use raw meat as a puppet and make it say, "Eat me! Eat me!" then throw it at my face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 252

You deserved it 7 798

Barf

By rawr_ily96 - 24/05/2020 08:00 - United States

Today, I was struck at home with a stomach virus. My dad, being an occasional insensitive smart-ass, decided to cook some bacon, sit right in front of the couch I was lying on, and eat the bacon. Last time I tried to eat bacon with a stomach virus... Not pretty. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 322

You deserved it 219

As a treat

By Undercooked - 24/09/2013 19:08 - Canada - Mississauga

Today, my girlfriend made bacon sandwiches for lunch. I didn't want to be rude, but I couldn't help but mention that the bacon smelled and tasted weird. I thought it may have expired. She said not to worry because she used the dry bacon under the counter. Those were dog treats. FML

I agree, your life sucks 53 080

You deserved it 4 768

By NickC - 29/11/2009 00:40 - Malaysia

Today, my girlfriend's parents wanted to cook dinner for me. After a whole day of cooking up a storm, her parents cooked an elaborate meal of roast lamb, pork chops and grilled chicken. Rejecting a meal is like spitting in ones face in Chinese culture. I'm vegetarian. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 197

You deserved it 14 985

Walking stereotype over here

By Anonymous - 23/07/2023 10:00

Today, I realized my father-in-law is basically Ron Swanson, when at a barbecue he ate some of my daughter's vegan sausages by mistake. When I told him they were vegan, he went to the bathroom, forced himself to throw them up, then sat and demolished 4 burgers, 8 sausages, and 6 chicken thighs, "LIKE A REAL MAN!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 792

You deserved it 234

Ham-fisted attempt

By HamHanded - 10/03/2017 09:17

Today, my loving but absent-minded father gave me a packet of ham for my birthday, which would be pretty shit even if I hadn't been a strict vegetarian for the last 27 years. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 654

You deserved it 710

By Username - 25/11/2011 16:15 - United States

Today, I woke up to the smell of bacon. It smelled so good, and made me very hungry. Then I realized it was my neighbor cooking. I have no money or bacon. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 254

You deserved it 4 160

By sick of this shit - 12/03/2016 13:33 - United States - West Grove

Today, my dad opened my fridge, let rip a horrible fart into it, then closed it and said "There ya go, a little somethin' for supper." FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 944

You deserved it 1 748

By fack - 26/11/2013 18:35 - United States - San Francisco

Today, my mom told me that when my sister and I were born, the first thing my dad said was, "I hope they don't turn out vegetarian." I did. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 540

You deserved it 10 178

By BFH4Life - 30/11/2011 09:27 - United Kingdom

Today, my dad announced to the whole family that we will be having a vegetarian dinner this Christmas to make my step-mum happy. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 940

You deserved it 5 745

DemonChicken 0

Wednesday 16 June 2010 19:07

or maybe the,"good joke honey" was sarcasm for,"I know you've given a million handjobs,just touch it" think about it!!

tencentsakiss 19

Wednesday 16 June 2010 19:30

or your dad knows you are a vegetarian but assumed that you could still at least touch meat. refusing to touch it seems extreme.

Comments

l3allin_all_day 0

Wednesday 16 June 2010 22:24

I ate lamb for dinner and it was sooooo goood

sloop_fml 0

Wednesday 16 June 2010 22:24

***breaking news*** you are allowed to touch meat as a vegan, moron. ever been laid? if not, plan to?

TheIrishJaneDoe 8

Thursday 17 June 2010 17:21

*** Breaking News *** OP is not a vegan. Sex jokes are irrelevant and definitely not witty.

skyeyez9 24

Wednesday 16 June 2010 22:26

I eat meat, but not lamb. It stinks so bad when you cook it. No matter if its baked or grilled. Imo it tastes like it smells...yuck.

Rick1969 6

Wednesday 16 June 2010 22:26

Just do a horrible job preparing it, and chances are you'll never be asked to cook again.

OfficerNasty95 0

Wednesday 16 June 2010 22:31

thats what u get for being a vegetarian dumbass

ktbird 0

Wednesday 16 June 2010 22:34

Oh great the vegetarian debate again. Didn't we just do this like a week ago?

loski87 4

Wednesday 16 June 2010 22:34

get over it

redtigerlily 5

Wednesday 16 June 2010 22:39

Some of you are vegetarian, yet you buy and eat products that are designed to look and taste like meat? That's pretty pathetic if you ask me.

nicholiepolie1 0

Wednesday 16 June 2010 22:50

#215- A lot of us vegetarians aren't in it because we just don't like the taste of meat... I used to love meat, but I decided that being a vegetarian was a much healthier way to go. And hey! I lost 10 pounds because of it. (: Fake meat allows us to enjoy what we pass up on in a healthier way.

chapachristina4 0

Thursday 17 June 2010 1:12

215- I love meat but I like to challenge myself so I went vegetarian..I became healthier. so some vegeterians also do it to challenge themselves..unfortunately I went back to eating meat :(

redtigerlily 5

Thursday 17 June 2010 5:33

Yes you returned to the delicious meaty side. Who can resist ^_^

chapachristina4 0

Thursday 17 June 2010 14:04

hahaha! I just imagined darth vader saying that xD

RedPillSucks 31

Thursday 17 June 2010 19:24

Resistance is futile. You will be assimilated. We will add your "meatalogical" distinctiveness to our own. From this day forward, you will service us. with delicious slabs of rack-of-lamb, served on a bed of lettuce sprinkled with ginger and lightly sauteed in some red wine.

TheIrishJaneDoe 8

Thursday 17 June 2010 19:41

This time I drooled.

katashtraphy 0

Wednesday 16 June 2010 22:40

asshole. I would just be such a bitch to him for two years.

ninjasaurous 0

Wednesday 16 June 2010 22:51

I used to be a vegetarian and really, it wasn't that bad and i got the perfect amount of protein to keep me healthy so the people that say vegetarians dont get enough protein, you're wrong!