Kids: Today, my two year old daughter was playing in the kitchen. I...

By Lisaa918 - 10/06/2009 14:49 - United States

Today, my two year old daughter was playing in the kitchen. I went to go have a look and she was pretend cooking. When I asked what she was making she said "look mommy, chocolate!" and stuck her finger in my mouth. It wasn't chocolate. FML

I agree, your life sucks 69 191

You deserved it 6 183

May weddings: Love and blunders
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Same thing different taste

By tenthousandspoon - 13/09/2010 00:08 - New Zealand

Today, at work, a three year old chucked a chocolate bar at me. It hit me square in the face. Her father praised her for her "quality arm." FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 835

You deserved it 3 048

By nutsucker - 08/03/2009 19:08 - United States

Today, I was babysitting a 7 year old girl and we were eating chocolate covered nuts. She kept on chewing the nuts and wondered where the chocolate was. I told her to taste the chocolate you suck on the nuts. Then her parents came home and the first thing she said was "I learned how to suck nuts!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 57 517

You deserved it 10 860

By gross - 06/08/2015 17:28 - United States

Today, I asked my one-year-old to come and give mommy a kiss. She did and it was really sweet, until she tried to spit a piece of dog food into my mouth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 818

You deserved it 3 168

By ManchotDesAndes - 26/02/2015 07:35 - France - Bezons

Today, my 3-year-old daughter came along, pointing a finger at me. I pretended to eat it by putting it in my mouth. She then said to me with disgust, "Why are you eating my booger?" Ah, that explains the saltiness… FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 298

You deserved it 11 164

Best gift ever

By Vanessa - 04/02/2023 00:00 - United States

Today, my toddler gave me what I thought was a ball of melted chocolate. I held it and sniffed it to be sure… It was a freaking ball of her poop. FML

I agree, your life sucks 758

You deserved it 226

Primitive art

By Anonymous - 19/04/2021 00:30

Today, I went to check on my 2 year-old daughter in her playroom, since she was being awfully quiet. I walk in to see her finger painting with her own feces on her kiddie table. FML

I agree, your life sucks 908

You deserved it 294

Everyone's a Critic

By Kitten - 19/06/2018 15:00

Today, I was playing some children's music while I cooked so my two-year-old was entertained a little. I started dancing while cooking and she looked at me with a straight face and said, "Mama... Don't dance." FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 974

You deserved it 666

My chocolate

By oops - 31/12/2019 05:00

Today, I was being playful with my boyfriend and put a chocolate between my legs. He bit the chocolate. My lips too... FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 027

You deserved it 1 785

By Sarah - 30/08/2012 12:58 - United States - Hampton Bays

Today, I found out that I'm not actually allergic to chocolate, when my mom freely admitted to me that she made it up when I was a child because she didn't want to share any cookies with me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 871

You deserved it 2 115

By FoodyFood - 19/03/2012 04:59 - Australia - Adelaide

Today, I told my daughter that she should put some love into her cooking. She started kissing the ingredients. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 056

You deserved it 14 722

soccerkrzy 0

Wednesday 10 June 2009 19:53

Please be dirt....and not poo...

dmmd8686 0

Wednesday 10 June 2009 19:53

I just threw up in my mouth a little bit...anyone who says YDI is foolish

Comments

soccerkrzy 0

Wednesday 10 June 2009 19:53

Please be dirt....and not poo...

gomego87 0

Tuesday 9 March 2010 6:14

YDI for eating poo. ew. *shivers*

Link5794 18

Saturday 4 September 2010 1:17

She deserves to eat poo that she already ate because she ate it? It wasn't even her fault you ******* tool.

newguy12 0

Wednesday 10 June 2009 19:53

time to get new cookware

joeyisinsane 0

Thursday 10 June 2010 22:06

at least she knows she's supposed to be in the kitchen at such a young age

MrsDruidess 23

Saturday 2 November 2013 11:37

time to take parenting classes!! who the hell leaves a two year old alone in the KITCHEN that long?? OP YDI

dmmd8686 0

Wednesday 10 June 2009 19:53

I just threw up in my mouth a little bit...anyone who says YDI is foolish

juicylover8 0

Saturday 3 July 2010 9:49

what's YDI stand for??

DemonicFatty 2

Tuesday 27 July 2010 7:10

it means you deserve it. and she doesn't deserve it.

BRBICECREAMTRUCK 0

Wednesday 10 June 2009 19:54

yummy

spoo 24

Wednesday 10 June 2009 19:55

yeah id pinch myself hoping to wake up

genius_man16 0

Wednesday 10 June 2009 19:56

YDI for having children

spoo 24

Wednesday 10 June 2009 19:58

whos the jack a who goes and clicks YDI for every dang FML.... #6... something is wrong with you, seriously wrong

antar_fml 0

Thursday 18 June 2009 3:22

Actually every parent deserves these little things .... she'd laugh about it herself when she recalls it later .

mimerino 9

Wednesday 2 May 2012 17:40

I don't think so.

smiley_girl 0

Wednesday 10 June 2009 19:58

EW what was it, hopefully not poo, I"m hoping dirt? after a few incedents of this type of thing myself I don't eat things kids "make" or let their hands be anywhere near my face. (babysitter)