Kids: Today, I woke up to my kids shaking me, saying, "Get up, Santa...

By crazycora - 13/12/2010 19:32 - Belgium

Today, I woke up to my kids shaking me, saying, "Get up, Santa was here!" I got up to find my TV, computer and MacBook Air all gone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 322

You deserved it 3 519

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Same thing different taste

By Julie - 25/12/2012 03:20 - United States - East Brunswick

Today, I woke up to find our Christmas tree knocked over, unwrapped presents scattered everywhere, and my mom passed out on the sofa with a bottle of booze. Merry Christmas. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 198

You deserved it 2 783

By treeless - 24/12/2011 08:11 - Canada

Today, my apartment was broken into. The thief stole my TV, $350, and my Christmas tree. There is still a trail of broken ornaments from my living room to the door. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 881

You deserved it 2 391

By wheatsnake - 08/10/2009 13:31 - Australia

Today, I took my new laptop into my house from my car, thinking it would be a too much of a target for kids grabbing it. I came home tonight to find my door kicked in, my laptop gone and my TV ripped from the wall. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 172

You deserved it 2 814

Surprise!

By BadKitty - 11/09/2016 13:37 - Australia - Invermay

Today, I woke up to a loud bang. Thinking someone had broken in, I grabbed my hunting knife and ran downstairs, only to find my TV on the floor, completely destroyed, and my cat casually sitting next to it without a care in the world. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 936

You deserved it 1 271

By fuckMYlife94321 - 26/04/2009 16:21 - United States

Today, I was taking a nap while my mom was at work. I woke up when she came home and didn't think anything of it so I went back to sleep. When I woke up again, I went downstairs and our 52" plasma screen TV, my xbox 360, and $1500 computer were all stolen. I'm guessing that wasn't my mom. FML

I agree, your life sucks 63 864

You deserved it 13 758

By dwhite032 - 06/06/2011 07:06 - United States

Today, I woke up to my Playstation 3 and my laptop missing and window open. My dad faked a robbery to see me freak out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 479

You deserved it 6 842

By pillowless - 13/10/2011 14:41 - United States

Today, I came home to find that my house had been broken into. The items stolen were my PS3, cell phone, laptop, tablets, and for some reason my deodorant and pillowcases as well. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 959

You deserved it 2 402

By dogh8er - 18/12/2011 19:31 - United States

Today, after spending hours wrapping the presents for Christmas, I came back into the room to find that my dog had lost his toy, knocked over all the presents, and was frantically ripping at everything to find it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 125

You deserved it 3 543

Bye gifts

By Anonymous - 12/12/2018 08:30 - United States - San Francisco

Today, it seemed like a great day. Right up until the point to where I accidentally damaged a friend's MacBook Pro. Not only do I have to pay for it, but the only way I'll be able to afford it is by returning every single Christmas gift I get. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 479

You deserved it 676

Oddly specific

By Angry and Confused - 29/06/2013 09:55 - United States - Reno

Today, my house was broken into. The burglar didn't steal my brand new laptop, iPad or TV. They instead made off with every single item of clothing I own. When I went to turn on my TV to try and distract myself from this, I found all of the cables in back missing. The police don't believe me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 53 168

You deserved it 2 956

DahkLohd 4

Monday 13 December 2010 22:59

So you were naughty, not nice? FYL

Fortuitous 0

Monday 13 December 2010 22:58

Someone was a bad, bad mother this year. :)

Comments

Ninjafriends 1

Tuesday 14 December 2010 20:20

Shhh, guys! She still believes in Santa!

NancyDeebensDPDS 0

Tuesday 14 December 2010 23:24

you have two computers? spoiled brat.

disgruntledyouth 0

Wednesday 15 December 2010 3:42

dont be sad, it was only a mac

LaUruguaya 11

Wednesday 15 December 2010 5:25

this makes NO sense, why would your kids think Santa came if your stuff is missing? 

RKftw68 0

Wednesday 15 December 2010 5:57

Santa is a pc duh

mrlonestar 0

Wednesday 15 December 2010 16:12

dumb ass lol

blankaex 0

Wednesday 15 December 2010 16:23

What? :( But I saw him at the shops?

mollysarah 0

Thursday 16 December 2010 2:10

you have stupid kids. Santa doesn't take things. YDI. just for having such stupid, crumb snatching, ankle biters.

Kez1181 0

Thursday 16 December 2010 6:23

Lol at 125 for using the phrase 'crumb snatching ankle biters'

CreativJam 3

Sunday 19 December 2010 8:55

Santa has to get his stuff somewhere, everyone knows elves aren't real

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The Top

Today, at work in a liquor store, a man came in to demand a refund because after he "drank the whole bottle of Jack" he "couldn't get it up" for his wife. He thought that alcohol was supposed to be an aphrodisiac, and blamed me personally for his "whiskey dick". FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 983

You deserved it 3 134

Today, my girlfriend said I make too many demands of her, and that I'm being unreasonable, I’m sorry but when dating surely it’s reasonable to expect conversation, intimacy, date nights, sex on occasion. Basically, if it’s not sitting on TikTok or Instagram, anything I want she says is “unreasonable.” FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 046

You deserved it 159

The Top

Today, I went to go get my driver's license, only to be told that I need a copy of my birth certificate. In order to get the copy of my birth certificate, I need a driver's license or my passport. In order to get a passport, I need a copy of my birth certificate or a drivers license. I have none. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 691

You deserved it 5 540

Today, my girlfriend has cats that live in my garage because I'm so horribly allergic to them. She went in the garage a while ago with power tools to do something simple. There has been a fair bit of noise and commotion in there. Part of me is happy that my girlfriend is trying to be handy, but I'm mostly worried about what could be going on. FML

I agree, your life sucks 605

You deserved it 291

Today, my boyfriend of 3 years drunkenly proposed to me, while sitting on the crapper, with the door open. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 260

You deserved it 4 869

Today, I was standing in a queue when an old lady turned, looked straight at me, and asked me to hold her bag. Confused, I took a hold of it. She started screaming for help claiming I was stealing her shopping. Turns out, she was talking to her husband behind me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 936

You deserved it 3 448

Today, after 3 nights of insomnia, I was finally able to doze off. My boyfriend woke me up just to ask which soda in the fridge was mine. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 409

You deserved it 2 087

Today, I got out of the shower to find my cat staring up at me. Apparently my swinging penis looks like a cat toy to her, so she jumped up and clawed and tried to bite it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 930

You deserved it 7 319

Same thing different taste

Surprise!

Bye gifts

Oddly specific

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