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By Username - This FML is from back in 2010 but it's good stuff

Today, I had been sick all day, so to cheer me up my dad drove me to get ice cream. On our way back, we hit a puppy. FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 573

You deserved it 4 942

World Environment Day : Green and Vaudevilles
Stories where love for the planet meets situations that are as green as they are funny! More…

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Same thing different taste

You played yourself

By Anonymous - This FML is from back in 2012 but it's good stuff - United States - Saint Paul

Today, I faked a sore throat for the school nurse so I could go home early. It took my dad the rest of the school day just to get there to pick me up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 096

You deserved it 49 192

Second class citizen

By crapped on - This FML is from back in 2011 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, my family went on vacation. I had to stay home to take care of everyone's animals. I called my mom, who said she was too busy to talk to me. When my sister asked her who was on the phone, she replied, "The dog sitter." FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 549

You deserved it 4 255

Rewind time

By supersmashpika - This FML is from back in 2015 but it's good stuff - United States - Hershey

Today, while walking down the street, a truck hit a puddle and splashed me with water. After I cursed and flipped him off, he put his truck in reverse and splashed me again. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 664

You deserved it 9 983

The ending of Lost explained

By Morgan - This FML is from back in 2011 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, I lost my dog. I looked around my neighborhood for hours, and found him under my bed asleep when I got home. FML

I agree, your life sucks 16 859

You deserved it 30 044

By Anonymous - 03/08/2016 18:01 - United States - Albuquerque

Today, my car broke down in the middle of nowhere. I walked about 3 miles to the nearest house to call a tow truck. When I got back to where I left my car, it was gone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 241

You deserved it 1 253

Hands off parenting

By iloveyoutoomom - This FML is from back in 2011 but it's good stuff - France

Today, my mom had an appointment with my teacher after class. She never showed. My teacher ended up driving me home. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 600

You deserved it 3 572

A tad overbearing

By nehadrihan - This FML is from back in 2014 but it's good stuff - United States - Oceanside

Today, my mom decided to follow me during my driving test. She rear ended me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 794

You deserved it 3 455

Self defence

By Anonymous - This FML is from back in 2009 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, I went to my grandmother's house to pick up her cat to take him to the vet. She forgot who I was and sprayed me in the face with pepper spray. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 105

You deserved it 2 479

By uninvited - 04/02/2016 15:16 - United States - Boston

Today, my parents called me to ask if I could drop my dog off to them on Sunday. They're having a Superbowl party and want to show her off to their guests. My dog is invited, but I'm not. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 254

You deserved it 1 747

Night on the tiles

By Anonymous - This FML is from back in 2012 but it's good stuff - Ireland - Gorey

Today, I thought it would be a good idea to sneak out of work early and pay a little visit to the pub. I ended up staggering home, drunkenly making myself a nacho cheese dorito milkshake with the blender, then promptly puked my guts out all over the kitchen table. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 978

You deserved it 46 583

eviiee_fml 3

Monday 26 July 2010 9:02

this is a fml for the dog not you. poor puppy :(

ActionManly 11

Monday 26 July 2010 9:03

What a CAT-astrophe! Wait, wrong pun...

Comments

9010649 3

Monday 26 July 2010 18:10

aaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhh poor puupy! D: !!!

brianjman14 22

Monday 26 July 2010 18:16

Clifford the Big Red Dog.

nero9112 4

Monday 26 July 2010 19:13

Well on the brightside, at least you hit a puppy.

amayaa_fml 7

Monday 26 July 2010 19:18

poor puppy :(

Hanicake 0

Monday 26 July 2010 19:41

I would have cried if it was me.

thescyphozoa 6

Monday 26 July 2010 19:41

saddesst FML ever!

ianzzz 0

Tuesday 27 July 2010 0:03

no it's funniest ever!

partygirl14 0

Monday 26 July 2010 19:48

omg that is so sad

manda980 0

Monday 26 July 2010 20:24

poor puppy:(

JuliaM1000 10

Monday 26 July 2010 20:25

THAT'S SOO MEAN!!!!!! :'{ poor pup! Ur dad needs to be more careful ya'know. :{

TheFun1 0

Monday 26 July 2010 20:31

I love 107 haha <3

Keywords

Work Job interview Money Animals Scams Cars Miscellaneous Health Painful Allergies Vegan Customers Landlords Kids Politics Transportation Airplanes Airport Embarrassing Technology Healthy Lifestyle Sports Poopoo peepee Gross Toilet Sex Intimacy Cheating Grandparents Sadness

The Top

Today, my girlfriend took our prank war way too far and had a package sent to me at home. Confused, I opened it. It contained a dildo and a bottle of lube. I didn't know my dad was watching over my shoulder until I heard him choke on his coffee and felt it splash over my neck. FML

I agree, your life sucks 55 367

You deserved it 9 927

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I agree, your life sucks 3

You deserved it 6

The Top

Today, I went shopping with some friends. We were tired from walking around the mall all night, so we decided to sit and relax at a table. I was about to close my eyes when I got smacked on the forehead by an orange falling from the second floor of the mall. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 326

You deserved it 3 911

Today, while out with my girlfriends, my overbearing boyfriend called and texted my phone over and over. Later, I told him to calm down and stop acting like my dad. He snapped back, "How am I acting like your dad when you don’t have one?" He knows my dad died when I was 10. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 634

You deserved it 279

Today, I returned a friend's jacket after borrowing it. I made sure to wash it and keep it clean. When he went to put it on, a pair of my granny panties fell out of the sleeve. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 991

You deserved it 7 657

Today, I applied mascara directly onto my eyeball. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 196

You deserved it 536

Today, my boyfriend and I got into a huge fight. Instead of taking me home like he told me he was going to, he pulled up to the gas station, gave me $6, and asked me to go pay. As soon as I walked inside, he threw my bag out the door, and drove off. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 502

You deserved it 6 821

Today, I went to a function with my dad for a football team. Handing my dad the camera, I finally worked up the courage to ask for a photo with my favourite player. The guy was looking at my boobs in all three photo attempts. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 732

You deserved it 231

Same thing different taste

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