Work: Accusations

Accusations

By cosmonaut - 07/08/2009 09:18 - New Zealand

Today, at work I noticed that the last of my pencils had been taken from my desk. I assumed it was the coworker who I've talked to at least ten times regarding taking my stationery. I approached her and, feeling brave, yelled at her in front of the entire office. I was holding the pencil. FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 895

You deserved it 71 424

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Same thing different taste

By JEalmon12 - 23/05/2019 12:00

Today, I was bored at my office, so I started flicking my pencils at my door. My boss walked in right then to give me a raise for my "outstanding" work. She scared me so much when she walked in that I flicked a pencil right at her face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 810

You deserved it 1 796

High school is hell

By Ani - 17/12/2021 10:58

Today, a "friend" of mine decided stealing my very low amount of sticky notes repetitively to make origami and show off was okay, even though I had repeatedly asked her to stop. Then, when I snapped, I was the bad guy, and everyone who was around started stealing my pencil case to get them. FML

I agree, your life sucks 878

You deserved it 201

By his word vs mine = me suspended - 10/08/2013 18:41 - United Kingdom - Stockport

Today, I was carrying a stack of paperwork at work, when my pen rolled off and onto the floor. As soon as I bent down to pick it up, a nearby co-worker, who's always hated me, accused me of putting on a show and sexually harassing him. He actually followed up by reporting me to HR. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 055

You deserved it 3 080

By Anonymous - 22/02/2013 02:56 - United States - New York

Today, I stole a pen from the doctor's office while she wasn't looking. Later on at work, I idly pulled the pen out during a meeting. My colleague looked at me, horrified. The pen had the words "minimally invasive gynecological surgery" emblazoned on it. I'm a man. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 658

You deserved it 51 488

By Red-cheeked - 18/05/2011 13:08

Today, at work, somebody stole my sunglasses. Fed up with the constant theft in my office, I stormed up to my boss, as he had long ago promised to catch the thief. He listened patiently to my rant before pointing out that my sunglasses were on my head. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 475

You deserved it 47 590

Keynote

By Andrew - This FML is from back in 2009 but it's good stuff - Canada

Today, there was a meeting at work, during which I had to give a presentation to my boss and other attendants. The first subject I had to tackle was how my 5 year-old son got to my briefcase and replaced its contents with some crayons and a fluffy teddy bear. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 469

You deserved it 5 577

Whackjob

By LaterAlligator - 26/08/2022 16:00 - Canada - Ottawa

Today, my psycho boss snatched a file from my hand so aggressively that I got a papercut. She then scolded me for bleeding on the papers. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 039

You deserved it 94

By Jay - 06/05/2009 04:52 - United States

Today, my boss asked me to pick up some supplies for a presentation. I entered the store in the middle of an armed robbery, was knocked to the floor, and had my cash, phone and credit cards stolen. When I told my boss the story, she said, "So were you able to get the binder clips?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 67 445

You deserved it 3 390

By KatieElizabeth - 27/10/2013 04:57 - United States - San Francisco

Today, at work, I had a customer accuse me of taking the giftcard I had issued her for her return, after spending 15 minutes trying to fix her screwed up transaction. She began to yell, and follow me around the store. Security had to intervene and I had to be locked in an office until she left. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 521

You deserved it 2 729

By ouch - 09/02/2011 18:02 - United States

Today, I was in class when all of a sudden I was hit in the head by a metal pencil case. My teacher threw it at me to get my attention. FML

I agree, your life sucks 19 749

You deserved it 35 515

WOLiF_922 0

Friday 7 August 2009 16:08

What a dick.

aero_fml 0

Friday 7 August 2009 16:12

Owned! But if I were her I'd do it again. Just to mess with you.

Comments

lovefml_fosho 0

Tuesday 10 August 2010 4:18

That is so messed up. And how old are you? What were you thinking making a scene like that at work? That's not professional at all.

eminarnar 0

Friday 22 October 2010 8:03

that's rude plain rude. I suggest anger therapy!

jgirlheartsradio 0

Wednesday 8 December 2010 1:48

um, dude..... it's a pencil. a cheap piece if wood and lead that costs about 5 cents. u coulda just asked nicely for it back. seriously

JokerJohn7 0

Friday 1 April 2011 1:14

quite possibly the best FML I've seen

NEEPLES 7

Saturday 22 October 2011 23:27

Calling fake on this one.

claiiire_fml 17

Friday 2 December 2011 4:20

Ha, you're a dumbass.

Chanq 5

Wednesday 1 February 2012 16:18

you are a damn b#tch...

JamesJem 0

Tuesday 10 April 2012 19:30

Triple FAIL!!!!

cartedor 18

Sunday 6 January 2013 11:58

Showing no mercy over something so pity, and doing so in such public manner, never good

Alinafshah2204 14

Sunday 4 May 2014 5:10

Time to apologize

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The Top

Today, I got in an argument with an ex-girlfriend who kept tactlessly bragging to me about her new boyfriend. I told her to read what she'd sent me, then pretend her boyfriend was telling her that. Fifteen minutes later, her boyfriend calls me, yelling for making her feel sad. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 354

You deserved it 3 859

Today, my favorite panty liners are anything a girl could need: Very thin and breathable, yet watertight, and the shape fits anything from granny panties to thongs. Two different brands offer such a thing, and naturally this is the very product that they both decided to discontinue. FML

I agree, your life sucks 441

You deserved it 62

The Top

Today, I spent hours consoling my girlfriend for getting dumped by the guy she was cheating on me with. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 305

You deserved it 79 329

Today, I was woken at 4 a.m. by the sounds of someone crashing down the stairs. I scrambled out, still half-asleep, to find out that nobody was in an agonized heap at the bottom. The walls are so thin in my house that I could hear the neighbour falling down HIS stairs. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 747

You deserved it 786

Today, my girlfriend of a couple of months texted me that she was very sad because her puppy had just passed away. Feeling sorry for her, I bought her another puppy of the same breed. I wrapped it in a blanket and placed it on the passenger seat and went to pick her up from school. She sat on it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 971

You deserved it 8 846

Today, I got sent home from work after a customer's daughter kicked me in the balls because her order was wrong. She was 6 years-old. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 295

You deserved it 115

Today, I went on a blind date. As soon as my date saw me walking towards him, he checked his watch and said, "Oops, wrong place." Then walked right past me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 997

You deserved it 2 645

Today, I was cooking. I leaned over the stove to preheat the oven, and burned my nipple on a pot of boiling water. I also have a teething son who is breastfeeding. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 262

You deserved it 11 130